The Pursuit of Bella Swan
by Lustful Muse
Summary: Bella has spent a century with the Volturi and has recently returned to her former lover Carlisle. Will he ever forgive her for leaving? And what happens when there's competition for her heart? A vampire story of love and longing.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: I wanted to write a story where Bella is already a vampire when she meets Edward for the first time. I'm not sure if Esme will be a character in this. I'm not even sure who Bella will choose in the end, but I'd happily listen to you make an argument for Carlisle or Edward... or another character, if you so choose.**

**Let the drama begin...**

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><p>Bella could hardly believe that she had come back to this place. It was such a small town with an almost nonexistent population, surrounded by an immense green forest. It was nothing compared to the thriving city of Volterra and that's what made her so relieved. Bella had spent the last century living with the Volturi and was more than ready for a change. She didn't want to deal with their manipulative ways any longer nor their constant quest for dominance. She had grown tired of such a life. Only the company of a certain pale haired vampire had urged her to stay as long as she did, yet even he was a disappointment in the end.<p>

She had left a short note without saying goodbye, knowing that it was time to move on. After boarding a plane to America, Bella had spent a few years roaming the country, until finally deciding to return to the place she had once called home.

Forks.

A small smile tugged at her lips as she looked into the ominous gray sky. Sure enough, it started to rain. Bella lifted her arms as she closed her eyes, oddly content with feeling the tiny drops splashing on her skin. It didn't matter that the water would soak the fabric of her clothes. She was a vampire. The chill of the air had no effect on her.

Bella continued walking along an obscured path in the woods. She swept a wet tendril of hair from her eyes as she considered what she was about to do. It had been many years since she had seen Carlisle and Bella didn't know if she was welcomed in his presence.

Would he resent her for their separation?

She could still remember the hurt and betrayal in his eyes when she had told him that she wanted to remain with the Volturi. They had taken a trip to Italy together and it had been her first time meeting them. She couldn't help but be drawn to their presence. Even as a vampire, she had found them intriguing.

Seductive.

How would it feel to simply let loose, to give into her baser instincts and feed upon human prey? They were more than willing to show her and Bella had taken to their lifestyle with ease. Years of restraint had been undone with a single taste of human flesh. The feel of the blood sliding down her throat had been nearly indescribable, but even that memory made her feel a pang of guilt.

What would Carlisle say upon seeing the faded red in her eyes?

Although Bella had reverted back to animal blood, the slight tinge around her irises was indicative of her previous diet. It had been a difficult transition. Even now, Bella still felt the occasional desire to plunge her teeth into a human, but was able to refrain from such impulses. It was fortunate that the population of Forks was so small. At least there would be less temptation.

She stepped into a clearing where a single house resided. She had been with Carlisle when he had first purchased the property. There had been a small cabin at the time, but after demolition and extensive construction, it had become a spacious Victorian-style manor.

Bella climbed the few steps onto the porch, running her hands along the banister. Even after all these years, the house still looked the same. Bella didn't know whether to rejoice or feel dismayed. Although the house appeared to be the same, surely its owner wasn't nearly as unchangeable.

For a moment, panic welled inside her. What if Carlisle was no longer here? It was highly possible. They had left Forks several times in order to avoid rousing suspicion with the way their appearances remained the same, regardless of the passage of time. Carlisle could have found a new place to live by now.

Nevertheless, Bella knew she had to try. She had wanted to make amends for so long and so she squared her shoulders, preparing to knock, when an unexpected thought came to her mind.

What if he had taken a mate?

Her hand fell limply to her side.

The implications of that unfurled in her mind as she concentrated on the air around her, only now aware of the lingering scents. She had been so distracted with her looming encounter that she hadn't paid enough attention to her surroundings.

The first scent she recognized was Carlisle's, which implied that he had been here recently. He had a warm and spicy scent that was as sensual as it was soothing. Bella had always found comfort in his smell. Her nostrils twitched as she registered several other scents. From what she could discern, there were five other vampires who had been on this property.

Two of which were female.

A low growl rippled in her throat. Her eyes grew wide as she silenced it immediately, completely ashamed. Her response was grievously inappropriate. She had forfeited any right to Carlisle the moment she had decided to leave him. Bella knew this, yet the thought of him with someone else still hurt.

During the moment it took for her to process this, a group of vampires had emerged from the forest. They had paused upon seeing her, but a petite woman with spiky hair ran forth. With a squeal, she threw her arms around Bella, twirling her in a circle while smiling.

"Bella!" she gushed, "You're finally here!"

She continued humming with excitement until Bella escaped from her grasp. Her attention was riveted upon the rest of the group, all of whom had yet to move, but mainly upon her former lover.

"Carlisle," Bella whispered.

She watched as he flinched and she felt her resolve crumble. So it was hopeless after all. Although she had never expected his forgiveness, the stark reality was too much to bear. She stared at the man before her as she watched the emotions flicker across his face.

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><p>There were very few things left that could surprise Carlisle. He had lived too long and had experienced too much to be truly shocked anymore, yet the arrival of Bella had rendered him speechless. Even with Alice's forewarning, seeing her in front of him was another matter entirely. Carlisle felt a rush of emotions.<p>

Shock.

Anger.

Confusion.

Arousal.

This was the woman that Carlisle had thought was his mate, until she had left him to stay with the Volturi. They had lived in his house and had even been together intimately. Quite frequently, as a matter of fact. Memories of her came rushing back and his groin began to stir in longing.

Before he could speak, Carlisle found himself slammed to the ground. Confusion set in as he lifted his head. Edward was crouched before him, snarling in rage. Emmett and Jasper ran forward to restrain him, but he shoved them away and sprinted towards Bella.

Carlisle watched in growing anger at the way Edward approached her. Having had a glimpse into his eyes, Carlisle knew that Edward's rational mind had slipped away. He was functioning on his baser instincts and it was this knowledge that prevented Carlisle from attacking, even as he felt his heart shatter all over again.

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><p>When Edward saw the memories inside of Carlisle's mind, something within him snapped. Before he realized what he was doing, he had thrown Carlisle to the ground and had raced towards Bella. Her scent beckoned to him like no other.<p>

He clutched at her soggy clothes, kneeling at her feet like a starved man. Alice's visions hadn't done her justice. She was beauty incarnate.

His hands traveled the smooth expanse of her legs, kneading the flesh he ardently desired. Her body was petite yet perfectly formed. Her legs were strong and lean, swooping out at the curve of her hips, before giving way to a narrow waist. Edward nuzzled his cheek into the lush mounds of her breasts, feeling as though he had finally come home.

Her hand reached for his messy bronze hair and he leaned into her touch, sighing in contentment. Edward didn't register her intentions, until she had forcefully yanked him away.

"What are you doing?" she demanded.

Her sweet breath washed over his face and Edward trembled in delight. He was intoxicated by her mere presence, but something was different about his dear angel. Focusing, he realized what it was.

Silence.

Edward couldn't read her mind.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

**Fenrisulfr: Thank you!**

**edwar4dlover84: Thank you, hearing that means a lot to me!**

**princessnerra: In this story, the idea of being Mates encompasses free will. It's not, for example, the same thing as imprinting where you don't have a choice with who you're meant to be with. Edward reacted strongly to Bella because HE believes that they're meant to be Mates. He finds her undeniably alluring.**

**Kittyinaz: I also enjoy my fair share of Bella/Carlisle pairings... but we'll see who Bella ends up with in this story!**

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><p>Bella sat on a white leather couch, under the scrutiny of six other vampires. Carlisle was next to her and although his proximity made her nervous, she was more uncomfortable with the presence of the rest. They were completely unfamiliar to her.<p>

The female vampire from earlier was still smiling at Bella in welcoming. She had finally introduced herself as Alice and was currently perched across from Bella on an armrest. She was the smallest, yet made Bella the most wary. There was a knowing glint in her eyes that Bella simply couldn't trust. On the chair she leaned against sat her mate, Jasper. He regarded Bella in silence, but there was an aura of calm around him, even as Alice ran her fingers through his hair, styling it this way and that.

The next two vampires were Emmett and Rosalie. They were mates as well, yet couldn't seem more different. Emmett was burly while Rosalie was statuesque. They were holding hands and seemed content to simply be near each other.

The last was Edward, who was seated the furthest away. He was staring at Bella with an unnerving intensity and his forearms were flexed as he clenched his hands in his lap.

"So this is the family you've created?" Bella asked Carlisle.

There was so much between them that needed to be said, but Bella would save that conversation for when they were alone. She didn't know how much of their past he had shared.

Carlisle gave a stiff nod in her direction. Since entering the house, he had refused to even look at her, although he had chosen to take the seat at her side. Hope had bloomed in her chest at the action. She turned to address the rest of the group.

"How have you been able to stay together in one place for so long?"

Surely a coven of their size would garner suspicion from the surrounding community. Even if they had committed to a diet of animal blood, it would be difficult to conceal their other anomalies.

"Carlisle works as a doctor at the local hospital and the rest of us are students at Forks High School," Alice trilled, seemingly immensely pleased with that statement.

"And no one's questioned the unusual relations of your family?" Bella continued.

"Nope!" Alice giggled. "The five of us are believed to be the adopted children of Carlisle!"

Bella glanced at Carlisle in surprise. It was one thing to sire all five vampires himself and another to declare them as his children to humans.

Alice skipped forward to clasp Bella's hand.

"So will you become our sister as well?"

Carlisle tensed upon hearing Alice's question. Although it seemed like an innocent thing to ask, it largely determined the future of his relationship with Bella. How could they be lovers if Bella was thought to be his daughter? Not that Carlisle had decided to forgive her.

_Yet_, his mind couldn't help but add.

Edward growled in warning and Carlisle concealed his thoughts from his son. He didn't want it to increase the chasm that had come between them. When Emmett and Jasper were wrestling Edward from Bella, Carlisle had watched them helplessly from the side. It tore at him to be witness to such a scene. Edward was usually the most composed of his children. It was the first time he had displayed such possessiveness and Carlisle was afraid to consider the ramifications. Edward had been immediately attracted to Bella.

Would he fight his son for her love?

If Bella could still blush, then her cheeks would have probably been a deep shade of red as she glanced at Carlisle hesitantly before replying.

"I don't know if I'm welcome here," she murmured. "Besides, you already have more than enough people in this house. I really don't want to impose."

Carlisle felt his chest constrict at the thought of Bella leaving him once more. Alice was trying to convince her to remain with them, but his intervention quickly silenced her.

"Stay," he whispered brokenly to Bella.

Carlisle had grabbed her wrist to stop her from standing, although Bella hadn't tried to do so. Sensing his emotions, Jasper had been the first to exit, steering Alice out of the house with him. Together, Emmett and Rosalie stood up as well, forcing Edward to leave with them. Edward had clenched his jaw, but followed them reluctantly. Carlisle had waited until they were gone to finally take a good look at Bella.

She was still as beautiful as he remembered.

Her head was lowered as she gazed at the spot where his hand had encircled her wrist. Even after all these years, Carlisle knew that he hadn't moved on. He had tried, of course, but his efforts had always ended in vain. Whenever he was close to being intimate with another, it was Bella that he saw in his mind.

Her smile, her scent – she consumed his senses.

It was as though Bella had laid claim to his heart and it was her face that he saw each night he lay awake. Alone in his bed, Carlisle would imagine that it was her hands touching his body, sliding down to caress his erection and stroking him to orgasm.

After his surge of lust had been sated, Carlisle would feel a fresh wave of torment. The truth of her absence always left him in agony.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

**princessnerra: I'm not yet sure whether or not Esme will appear in this story.**

**edwar4dlover84: Ditto!**

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><p>Edward ran further into the forest. He didn't know where the others had gone, but he couldn't bear to be anywhere near them. He needed to be alone.<p>

He felt mortified after his earlier display. Loathing filled him as he remembered the desperate way he had thrown himself at Bella. Of course she would reject his advances. There was nothing about him that could sway her affections.

Bella only had eyes for Carlisle.

Edward lunged at a nearby deer, crushing its windpipe as he threw it to the ground. Snarling, he ripped its tender body apart, careless of the way its blood splattered his clothes. He drank from it quickly, as though he were famished.

Still, it wasn't enough.

Swiping at the blood on his mouth, Edward dashed away to continue his hunt, leaving the mangled carcass behind.

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><p>Carlisle stood from the couch and released Bella's wrist.<p>

"You've been drinking from humans," he stated.

Bella glanced to the side in shame. Carlisle walked away from her, stopping in front of a large bay window to stare into the forest. It was silent and Bella never felt more vulnerable. His back was towards her as the sun was setting, casting a faint shimmer on his skin. He looked too ethereal for words. Bella yearned to go to him, to have him in her arms again.

A familiar pain took hold of her chest. How had she survived without him?

After the novelty of the Volturi had worn off, Bella had realized just how empty her life was. She had traded Carlisle's companionship for a shallow, meaningless existence. She was a fool and had been one for too long.

Bella knew that she didn't deserve his forgiveness, but inside she was selfish and sought it most ardently. Yet, as much as she hoped for their relationship to be restored, another part of her wished that he would scorn her advances, demanding that she stay away.

Bella was equal parts hopeful and terrified.

Slowly, she stood up and approached Carlisle silently. He didn't turn towards her nor did he move away. Bella wasn't sure what to make of that and so she hesitantly crept closer. She placed her palms flat on his back, feeling him tense under her touch.

"Carlisle," Bella said sadly.

She placed a soft kiss on his back and his body shuddered violently. Bella closed her eyes as she breathed him in, pressing her nose at the spot between his shoulder blades.

"Carlisle," she repeated, her voice muffled by his shirt. It was several moments before he responded.

"Why did you leave?" he asked forlornly.

Bella felt her heart clench. There were no words that could explain how she felt, how utterly sorry she was for her actions. Hoping that he wouldn't pull away, Bella reached forward and placed her arms around his waist.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, kissing his back again. She kissed him several more times, regret and sorrow pouring into each touch.

Bella felt him come undone in her grasp.

They stayed that way for a while. Bella holding Carlisle as his whole body shook, convulsing with the tears that threatened to fall, yet wouldn't have the chance to do so.

"I missed you," she confessed. Bella squeezed his waist tightly. "Is it wrong that I still want you?"

Carlisle whimpered at her words. He had yearned to hear them for so long. Yet, as much as he wanted to take Bella back, he couldn't trust her with his heart.

"Do you know how much I've missed you?" he asked. "I've waited for you everyday for a century."

Bella muffled a sob, but he continued.

"Why did you take so long to come home?"

Carlisle felt the air shift between their bodies as she let go of his waist and stepped slightly back. Bella had covered her face with her hands. The weight of his words were left hanging in silence.

He shifted uncertainly. Why wasn't she responding?

"I don't deserve you," she finally murmured.

Her desolate expression said everything she didn't. The pieces of their relationship had been left in shambles and neither of them knew what to do to mend it.

"Will you stay with us?" Carlisle asked.

They had once talked about starting their own coven. Carlisle hadn't relished the idea of changing people into vampires, but still wanted to find others who were committed to their lifestyle. Bella had been in full support of this dream, but things had happened differently then they intended. Carlisle had turned people and Bella had left.

Indecision flickered across her face as she glanced away, struggling with her words.

"As your daughter?"

"No!" Carlisle shouted, then lowered his voice. "No, as a friend."

Carlisle stepped closer and reached for her hands. He ignored the way his skin jolted upon contact.

"We can be friends."

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

**cheetahg14: Thank you!**

**princessnerra: To me, Edward is the "underdog" right now and I've always been partial to underdogs in a story.**

**Kourtney: Thank you!**

**tu-tu2: I think the way Edward first reacted is very similar to imprinting, though he retains his ability to choose.**

**Kittyinaz: Lol, there's something I like about every character, but I do know what you mean. Bella/Edward stories tend to dominate, it might be nice if this could be a Bella/Charlisle story... but only time will tell.**

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><p>"A music teacher?" Emmett repeated, covertly glancing towards Edward.<p>

Eventually the family had returned to the living room. Everyone was sitting in his or her prior seats, which left Edward alone once again.

He gazed sullenly at the floor. Edward often loathed his ability to read minds, but never so much as he did right now. He could already feel the pity radiating from his siblings; he didn't need to hear it too. It wasn't a secret how much he desired Bella, yet tomorrow she would be a teacher at Forks High School.

And he would be one of her students.

"What instrument do you play?" Alice asked.

"I enjoy the violin, but my favorite is the piano. I think it has such a beautiful sound."

_Of course Bella would play the piano_, Edward thought bitterly. Apparently, there wasn't enough ways to torture him. Why not have them play the same instrument too?

Edward watched the way the rest of his family interacted with Bella. Even Rosalie was exhibiting tentative signs of friendliness and Edward didn't know how much more he could take. He had only known Bella for about a few hours, yet it already felt as if his entire world had shifted to revolve around her. He had contemplated spending some time with the Denali clan, but even that seemed impossible.

Edward couldn't bear to leave Bella. Every gesture, every word – he was carefully attuned to. It was madness to feel this way and suppress it. But what could he do? His father had more claim then he did and Edward felt compelled to honor that. The solution had come with painful clarity. Edward would simply have to deny himself.

Fortunately that was something he excelled at.

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><p>"Here we are!" Alice announced, opening the bedroom door in front of her and gesturing for Bella to come inside.<p>

The decorations in the room were sparse yet elegant. There was a large closet situated in the corner with a desk and chair adjacent it. A canopy bed dominated the room, which Bella found odd considering that vampires don't sleep. What caught her eye was the shelf against the wall. It was filled to the brim with books.

"I know it isn't much but Carlisle insisted you would like it."

Alice glanced at her and Bella could see the expectation in her eyes. It was obvious that she was waiting for the invitation to decorate. Based on their earlier tour of the house, Bella knew that Alice had a love for design. The petite girl was practically vibrating as she stood there.

"I do like it," Bella replied. "It's much more than I could ever ask for."

Bella had arrived with only the clothing on her back. She was capable of getting what she needed to survive and thus paid little attention to frivolous items.

Bella sighed as she noticed Alice watching her with a pouted lip.

"But maybe you could help me decorate?" she asked reluctantly.

"Yay!" Alice squealed, the twinkle present once more in her eyes. "You won't be disappointed – I do excellent work. Now it's time I showed you how we hunt!"

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

**princessnerra: Embrace the heartache! Lol, but yeah, this story will definitely be melancholy. We'll have to see who Bella chooses.**

**alliwantiswolf: Your words have made my day! Thank you so much!**

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><p>Bella smoothed her blouse as she waited near the door, nervous about her first day as a teacher. Although Alice had taken her hunting last night, her throat still tingled at the prospect of being in such close proximity to humans once again. This time she wouldn't be viewing them as food. They were to be her students and co-workers. Bella absolutely refused to slip up. She didn't want to be a disappointment anymore.<p>

Turning towards the stairs, Bella instinctively sensed Carlisle approaching. He was rolling up the sleeves on his pale blue collared shirt. Bella watched, transfixed, at the way his forearms flexed with each movement. He was completely alluring in his grace.

"Good morning," Bella greeted softly.

Carlisle gave a bashful smile in her direction. He grabbed his keys from the table, jingling them in his fist. Hesitating for several moments, Carlisle finally laid a hand on Bella's shoulder. Bella couldn't help the jolt that coursed through her.

"I hope you enjoy your new job at Forks High School," said Carlisle.

Bella could only nod mutely in response.

He seemed about to say more but then quickly removed his hand. Bella glanced back at the stairs. Edward was watching their exchange silently. Their eyes met and Bella caught a glimpse of longing before Edward jerked his head away.

Carlisle cleared his throat awkwardly.

"Well then, I'll be going now."

He offered her another brief smile, but this one was just a subtle rise of his lips. Bella fiddled with the briefcase in her hands as she continued to stand near the door, waiting for the rest of the family. Alice had arranged for her to ride to school with them. Emmett would be driving his jeep with Rosalie, but it was Edward who would be taking Alice, Jasper, and herself. Bella knew she needed to acquire her own vehicle soon. She was not relishing the prospect of being in such close proximity to Edward. He was simply much too intense.

Bella was not capable of returning his interest.

How could she? Bella knew she had a perfect mate in Carlisle. It was his attention and forgiveness that she must acquire. Anything else would be superfluous.

Edward maneuvered his way around the room. Bella refrained from following him with her eyes, but she was nevertheless aware of his every movement. Finally Alice and Jasper made their way down the stairs. Bella felt her tension abate.

"Good morning!" Alice chirped as she seemingly pranced down each step.

Jasper was following close behind her, an amused expression upon his face as he gazed down at Alice. Rosalie and Emmett appeared shortly after. Watching the so-called siblings interact made Bella feel out of place. Their familiarity with each other was apparent. It made Bella hope that she could one day acquire that level of closeness. Despite living with the Volturi for so long, never once did she feel the natural comfort that these coven members exhibited.

The Cullens gave new meaning to the word family. Watching their playful banter, suddenly such an idea didn't seem so foolish after all.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

**bethanyhopeless: Thank you!**

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><p>Edward refrained from reaching across the ten and a half inches that separated them. His hands were balled into fists in his lap as he kept his head turned towards the car window.<p>

Outwardly, he knew that he was the picture of calm, or at least would have been were it not for the spastic way that Jasper kept glancing back at him from the passenger seat, no doubt sensing his anguish and desperation. Ignoring him, Edward feigned interest in their surroundings, the same route they took to and from school everyday. Really, though, he was hopelessly in tuned to the beauty seated next to him.

From the corner of his eye, he noticed how the deep blue blouse that Bella wore complimented her creamy skin to perfection. The soft drape of the fabric outlined the contours of her body. Her legs were molded into a fitted white skirt, her lush calves causing saliva to pool in his mouth and her dainty feet encased in black stilettos.

Finally, when Edward could no longer control his urge to look, he turned his head and found himself locked in a stare with Bella.

He could not turn away. This was the first time she ever showed any interest in him. Edward would savor this moment for as long as it lasted.

"Did you know that the piano was invented in Italy?" Bella blurted.

In truth, he did, but instead he shook his head, eager for her to continue speaking. It was apparent that she only did so out of nerves, although Edward could not fathom why she would ever feel uncomfortable with him. Nevertheless, it was an opportunity for him to know her, to learn about everything that made her Bella.

They continued discussing the history of pianos, as well as any other musical instrument that came to mind. Were Edward not already enamored with Bella, then her knowledge and versatility in so many subjects would cause him to be. Could it be possible that his mate would truly be his match in every way? He's always had his siblings as an example, but seeing it and feeling it are not the same.

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><p>Alice did not have to be an empath to know just how desperately Edward desired Bella. Next to her, she was also aware of how such feelings made Jasper squirm restlessly. Taking one hand off the wheel, she reached over and patted his lap in sympathy. With the onslaught of emotions he's had to deal with recently, it's no wonder that he's been feeling strained.<p>

When Edward saw her vision of Bella, there was nothing she could do about the conclusions he came to. Of course he would assume that Bella is his mate. He was too blinded to truly realize just how much Carlisle cared for her.

Finding a mate was a tricky thing. What did it mean to be "True Mates," anyway? She did not doubt her love for Jasper nor did he ever doubt hers, but she also knew that no relationship is perfect. Could Bella still love Carlisle even though she had left him? Alice certainly believed it was possible, but she also knew just how much Edward wanted to prove his own love to Bella. Would Bella ever give him the chance he deserved?

Despite her visions, Alice really didn't know.

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><p><strong>Author's Note: Please review!<strong>


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